Becoming parents can be a wonderful experience for a couple, leaving them confident and strong.
However, things sometimes do not go as planned, and couples separate for multiple reasons: cheating, loss of love, or work, to name a few.
If a person has separated from their partner or chosen to parent a child alone, they have to bear the responsibility of becoming a single parent.
This can be difficult at times but can also be fulfilling and wonderful. More compromises have to be made but In the end, the sacrifices are well worth it.
Common Problems of Being a Single Parent
It can be challenging to juggle life’s challenges while being a good parent and providing for your little ones.
This challenge is heightened if it is being done alone. Some of the common problems single parents face are:
Extra Financial Burdens
Money struggles can be stressful, especially when you have to raise a child on your own, and it is important to find ways to relax and take care of your mental health and yourself to alleviate the stress.
This can be done through exercise, reading, or dedicating a room for relaxation in your house where you are not to be disturbed.
If you are a single parent without any child support or spousal payments, you may have trouble making ends meet.
It can be expensive to raise a child on your own. You might have to work at more than one job or skip vacations and decrease your leisure expenses to pay the bills.
One financial cost that should not be cut is life insurance.
You might wonder, is life insurance worth it? Since it is hard enough to care for your children financially as a single parent, it is definitely harder to plan for their long-term future, and having a good life insurance plan may provide security for your children well into their adult lives after you pass.
Problems at Work
Naturally, since you are the single parent, in case anything happens to your child, you will be the first contact person to take care of the situation. Whether the child woke up sick, or got ill in school, or an emergency happened while you were not with them, you will be called away from your job.
As mean as this sounds, this might actually lead to multiple problems at work. Some employers will not allow an employee to suddenly leave, and this absenteeism will lead to wage cuts, bad performance reviews, and in the worst case, layoffs.
Loneliness and Lack of Social Interaction
Single parents are often lonely because work and taking care of the kids doesn’t leave much time for a social life. Some people do well alone, and others do not. Many single parents join parenting groups to meet other adults. These single-parent groups can become your support system and offer guidance when you feel stressed or face a challenging situation.
If a single parent doesn’t have time to join the groups mentioned above in person, they can always find multiple online groups, forums, and chat rooms where they can bond and network with other single parents, and help each other as their schedule suits them.
Difficulty Disciplining Your Children
If the reason why you’re a single parent is divorce, you must also realize how hard it can be for kids. A divorce will have different psychological effects on children and they may act out as a result. It may be difficult for you to set boundaries or discipline your children when they break the rules.
You may understand that they are simply reacting to the situation, but you also know they need healthy boundaries to become good adults. You should keep a close eye on your kids’ friends. You will want to avoid any bad influences in their lives.
With social media being the focal point of where children might meet new people and friends, you can research someone very easily using a username lookup tool. Knowing who your kids are hanging around with will give you peace of mind.
Your Child’s Reaction to You Being a Single Parent
The change of going from a two-parent household to a single parent can be confusing and difficult for your child. Be patient with them and explain the situation as best as you can. Your kids may be angry with you and blame you. Be sure to monitor their behavior and encourage them to share their feelings.
Usually children find it difficult to open up and share their feelings with their parents, fearing the reaction. If that is the situation, you may also consider a counselor, so your child has a third party to talk to.
Common Strengths of Being a Single Parent
Although there are plenty of negatives, there are also a lot of positives to being a single parent. Some things to enjoy when you are a single parent include:
Ease of Decision-Making
One great thing about being a single parent is you get to make all the decisions yourself. You don’t have to consult with anyone else, and you can raise your children based on the values and norms that you see fit. You’re in the driver’s seat.
More Financial Control
You can also choose how you want to spend your money on yourself and the kids. Whether you sign them up for soccer, martial arts, drawing, or decide to go on a family cabin getaway, you are the one who decides how to spend your money.
Children Take Responsibility
It is more than often that children see how their single parent might be struggling and naturally tend to help around the house with different chores.
This can be seen as an excellent bonding activity between the parent and the children where it is a win-win situation for everyone involved.
The responsibility gained by children completing tasks at a young age will model them to become better adults in the future.
Parent-Child Friendship
Often children of single parents feel like a best friend raised them.
The bond between single parents and their kids is usually very close and will continue into adulthood, allowing you to transition from parent-child to parent-friend.
Lack of Parents Fighting
If a divorce led to you becoming a single parent, it might lead to your child developing serious problems. But, down the line, the calm after the storm has excellent results.
Not having any parental or familial issues in the household relieves overall tension and stress, and if the mood within the house was toxic before the legal separation, the result can be seen immediately.
How to Cope with Single Parent Status
Single parenting used to carry a negative stigma but not anymore. Most people understand that marriages fail, leaving single-parent families.
However, it is essential to remember to show your kids all the love you have and communicate openly with them. Other tips include:
- Keep things routine. Kids do better with consistency.
- Set boundaries and limits with your kids and follow through.
- Take care of yourself.
- Rely on your support system and ask for help when you need it.
Ben is a Web Operations Executive at InfoTracer who takes a wide view from the whole system. He authors guides on entire security posture, both physical and cyber.