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Can Divorced Parents Happily Live in the Same House?

Every relationship, every family, and every divorce is different. What works for one family may not work for another. It is not fair to say that divorced parents can live happily in the same house. It is more accurate to say that some divorced parents can live in the same house. This approach to co-parenting is not for everyone. There are positives and negatives to it. For some, it is a way to create a balanced life. For others, it is staying under the same roof with someone with whom they cannot communicate. For those interested in trying it, it can be effective; however, it takes work. It is not going to happen overnight, and it is going to take time for everyone to become comfortable with the new arrangement. If the relationship is contentious, then creating this balanced life and living together is probably not going to work.

What is Needed For It To Work?

Once the divorce is final, and the emotional part of divorce is behind you, you may be able to focus on creating new relationships with your ex-spouse. There may be waiting periods for divorce; in Kansas, there is a 60 day mandatory waiting period, which can give you time to talk through this new lifestyle. This is a great situation for parents who do not think single parenting will work for them. For this to work, each parent must be given space with no questions asked. One parent is responsible for the children at a time. The other parent is free to do whatever they want. They can stay in the house, or they can go out. This process must be logical and not emotional. It is critical that you work through the problems of the divorce ahead of time, or at least work out a schedule, so those issues are avoided.

Benefits Of Living Together

When co-parents live in the same house, they can support each other. They can build a respectful relationship that is open and honest. In addition, living in the same house reduces the bills. This is because you are both sharing the bills for one space instead of each of you paying all the bills in two different spaces. This includes utilities, mortgage, insurance, and other home-related items. For example, in the U.S., air conditioners are an annual cost of $29 billion because they use about 6% of all the electricity produced.

Tips For Making It Work

There is data to prove that children do better with both parents in their lives. However, there is not much data to support how beneficial it is to children who live in the same house. When you begin to define this new relationship, you need to lay the foundation. It would be best if you established rules by which you live. Some areas to consider are defining the relationship between each parent with the children. You want to determine if both spouses will share time with the children together. You want to determine if the holidays are spent together and if you will eat dinner together. All the rules need to be determined and outlined. You also need to discuss if you are both free to date. When you outline the relationship, you want to decide who has what responsibilities and when, including chores around the house. You also want to define the space where you live. It would be best if you decided where each of your living spaces will be and what the common areas are.

These are just a few suggestions for achieving a balanced life with your ex-spouse. Of course, this lifestyle is not for everyone, and it may not be you. But, it is another option available to you and your ex-spouse to create a balanced life.

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